Content Warning: What to do with girlbulge in public spaces, including social media?

Content Warning: Sexual content

Trigger Warning: Gender Dysphoria

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Sometimes we use the euphemism “girlbugle” to refer to transgender women who are assigned male at birth either who are pre gender confirmation surgery or who opt not to get bottom surgery for whatever reason. The term itself is about as polite a way of telling people our genitals are none of their business.

I have gender dysphoria about my body. When I say I am comfortable in my skin what I mean is that I am okay being over weight. I am fine with the shapes of my curves. I am as happy with my breast development as I can be, but I have one area I refuse to let get me down, my downstairs bits. I don’t need to talk about what I got, what I intend to do about it or anything but I do want to talk about girl bulge. I feel the need to get my feelings on the subject off my chest, especially since now I got boobs there’s not much room on my chest for extra stress these days.

I write this as delicately as I can knowing there are other transwomen who have tremendous dysphoria regarding their junk. When I first came across a picture on Twitter of a transwoman sporting a bulge I was grossed out. I immediately thought that’s not very passing of you and wrinkled my nose. Once the shock of it wore off I remembered passing is not a goal for everyone so I calmed down. Then I had to spend some time with my thoughts to determine what I think about the whole concept of passing.

I do not tuck. I wrote about that previously if you want to read it go here. I m not sure if my feelings have changed all that much since then. I rarely wear makeup. Passing is not my goal. Being comfortable with my body is. That includes finding a way to live with the shortcomings I am stuck with. Surgery is not a topic I want to discuss for myself. What I sport downstairs is nobody’s business and I want to keep it that way. What I want to talk about is why I think girlbulge is something we should be less afraid of but also mindful of others.

At first glance when someone is told what they can or can’t do with their own bodies even in public spaces, it makes that person defensive. Body autonomy is a huge part of what being transgender is all about. My body, my right. It goes hand in hand with reproductive rights and sexual orientation rights. The freedom to do with ones own body as they please is the ultimate goal of the LGBTQ+ movement if there was a so-called agenda. Yet there is a caveat we must take into consideration.

Unlike the conservatives who are trying to suppress us when they try to hide our differences from their views, we do need to remember to respect those of us who suffer from intense gender dysphoria regarding our own bodies. Especially the genitals. It’s a sensitive subject but it’s like this, when a transgirl has the confidence to say “I don’t need Facial Feminization Surgery” I am comfortable in my skin, she is not saying nobody needs FFS. It is the same with girlbulge. Some people are comfortable not to tuck. If their junk is sufficiently endowed they might sport a noticeable bulge wearing certain outfits. Keeping in mind others do get dysphoria though it becomes an issue of when does your own confidence become a trigger for someone else?

Going back to FFS for a second if someone shares online they desperately want FFS and someone else who is fine with their features replies something like “oh you are beautiful you don’t need it,” that is not helpful. It can trigger the other persons dysphoria. Same with bulge. Someone who is in agony over their own genitals does not want to be subjected to pictures of other women showing off theirs. Same for those who have had bottom surgery sharing pictures of their own accomplishments. This is where one must be mindful of public spaces. This includes social media. It is far more polite and respectful, for those with gender dysphoria to either not share those pics publicly, or at the very least provide sufficient spoiler/content tags to give the person a chance not to be triggered.

By all means I support shoving our body autonomy choices down the throats of conservative busy bodies. But I likewise request caution when doing so might inadvertently cause our sensitive sisters harm. AS for me I don’t mind seeing it so long as I get a fair warning upfront. Others might not be so lucky so I have chosen not to share pics when I come across them or even posts discussing the topic. Even this one will come with a full content warning.