If it hasn’t become abundantly clear that nerds rule the world then you’re probably living under a rock somewhere on a deserted island with no Wi-Fi. And if you’re not stuck in the middle of a 1990s Tom Hanks flick then you’re probably a geek like the rest of us. But you’re probably overwhelmed by all of the nerdery going on i the world. This is my starter guide on how to be a nerd in 2021. Think of it as a few things that you might want to pick up to get started building your nerd cred.
1. You’re going to need a Nintendo.
You could cheap out and get a NES classic edition but if you want to be a true nerd you’re going to have to buy an original Nintendo Entertainment System that was actually made in the late 80s early 90s. You don’t need all the video games but you should pick up the following if you really want to establish good nerd cred: Super Mario Brothers 3, contra, DuckTales, Ninja Gaiden, Battletoads, punch out, Castlevania, Mega Man 2 and you need at least three ljn games picked at random most likely.
Bonus nerd points if you buy any Final Fantasy or Dragon Warrior games.
2. You totally need a VCR.
Even if you’re not willing to actually invest in the hardware you need a VHS collection. And it absolutely must include all of the following or it does not count: Rocky, Top Gun, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, The Breakfast Club, Friday the 13th Part 3, Gremlins, Ghostbusters, Back to the Future Part 2, The Muppets Take Manhattan, Labyrinth, The NeverEnding Story, The Matrix, the original unaltered Star Wars trilogy, Star Trek II The Wrath of Khan, Star Trek 4 just the one with the whales, A Nightmare on Elm Street part 4 the dream master, twister, tremors, Independence Day id4, Jurassic Park, Indiana Jones take your pic, Die Hard, Terminator 2, and of course Titanic.
Bonus nerd points if you get Hacker’s, war games and Weird Science.
3. A handful of retro action figures.
You probably need two or three classic GI Joe A Real American hero toys, an assortment of I’ll say 5 to 7 vintage TMNT toys, a handful of Masters of the Universe toys, at least three G1 Transformers one of them has to be either Bumblebee, Soundwave or the original Optimus Prime. You also should pick up a Rubik’s Cube, an electronic Simon, a light bright, and probably a Care Bear and maybe a couple of Lego sets vintage Lego sets.
Bonus nerd points if you get any Gobots or M.A.S.K sets.
4. You’re going to need t-shirts and baseball caps.
You’re going to need no less than 20 t-shirts all of them have to have pictures or logos or slogans something that shows the world you’re a nerd and you have to wear them with pride. Ball caps can also be a mixed assortment but you should have some that are actual sports teams and some that are just logos or company slogans that you like. The acceptable sports teams that will get you pegged as a nerd and not as an actual sports fan are the Kansas City Chiefs, Duke, Notre Dame, the Boston Celtics, Chicago Bulls, LA Lakers, or the Raiders. Any other sports teams and you’re going to get flagged as a sports fan which is dangerously close to a jock. Now it’s okay to sport colors and ball caps of your favorite team during days that they have a game going on you can show your team spirit if you will for the rest of the time it needs to be from the above list.
Bonus nerd points if your t-shirts and ball caps are obscure anime or 80s WWF wrestlers.
5. You’re going to need a Walkman.
This is what I’m going to say you can get the tape player or you can get the disc player but it has to be one of those two if you get the tape player you have to buy a load of cassettes no less than 30 if you get a disc player you can get by with 10 to 15 CDs especially if they are cdrs that you burned yourself.
Bonus nerd points if you get a record player and an assortment of vinyl records.
6. Comic books and comic book trading cards.
It goes without saying you’re going to need comic books if you want to be branded a nerd. But it can’t just be Marvel Avengers and DC Justice League you got to have some true nerd comics. This requires you to dig a Little Deeper you want stuff like spawn, Wildcats, TMNT, Vampirella, Hellboy, Star Trek, Scooby-Doo, and yes you’re going to need an assortment of Archie Comics if you want true nerd cred. That’s of course on top of the Marvel and DC fair that you’re expected to read.
Bonus nerd points if you have any Harvey Comics or Disney Donald Duck comics.
7. You need a Game Boy no for real.
You absolutely do not have the right to call yourself a nerd if you don’t own an actual Nintendo Game Boy. Lucky for you it doesn’t have to be an original Gameboy but it does have to be one made by Nintendo so it can be a Game Boy Advance, it can be a Game Boy Color or Gameboy light are you going to Game Boy Pocket it’s your choice but it has to be one that was made by Nintendo and it has to play Real Game Boy cartridges and no getting a super Game Boy or Game Boy Player for one of your game consoles doesn’t count. Neither does downloading ROMs on a retropie or even a 3DS. Although you can certainly do those things to you lose nerd points if you don’t have authentic retro Hardware.
Bonus nerd points if you get a Sega Game Gear.
8. You better have no less than four computers.
You need to have your desktop computer which needs to be your main gaming rig, you need a fairly decent tablet computer this can be iPad or Android it’s your choice. You also need a laptop obviously and then you should have for True nerd credibility a vintage PC of sorts this is where you get a lot of leeway because it can be a Commodore 64, an Amiga, Apple II, IBM clone running Doss or early versions of windows or hell you can even get really obscure and get one of those Tandy or even an Atari computer if you really want to they should have at least something that was made prior to 1993.
Bonus nerd points if you get your vintage computer connected to the internet.
9. TV shows on DVD.
I’ll make it easy I’ll just list them you need all of the following: Rugrats, The Simpsons, Boy Meets World, Dragon Ball Z, That 70s Show, community, The Big Bang Theory, Frasier, Seinfeld, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Star Trek the Next Generation, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Psych, Eureka, Golden Girls, Punky Brewster, Saved by the Bell, Full House, Futurama, Family Guy, X-Files, The Powerpuff Girls, Scooby-Doo, WCW Monday Nitro and WWF Raw.
Bonus nerd points if you have DVD sets of YouTube shows for example Angry Video Game Nerd or Pat the NES Punk.
10. Miscellaneous junk.
The more of the following you have the more nerd points you get : board games, miniatures, model trains, Star Wars memorabilia, lunch boxes, Lego sets, puzzles, coloring books, paperback novels, magazines, old Sears and Toys R Us, Funko Pops, collectible action figures, trading cards, Smurf figurines, laserdiscs and vinyl records.
Bonus nerd points if you have an HD DVD player, betamax VCR, 8-track cassette player, Microsoft Zune, a film projector with actual film to project, pogs, and of course model kits.
Stephanie Bri 